How long has it been?

I lost count of the months since I've stopped writing.
I guess tonight, I gotta let my feelings out.

It has been 3 weeks, I think, since I've... broken up with the guy whom I thought will be... the one.
We broke up after 1 year we


Assalamualaikum w.b.t

This is for the kids who's right now feeling down with their SPM result.


So, how was today for you guys? Exciting? Awesome? Or vice versa? Before I start my rant, I would like to congratulate those who aced the SPM. Congratulations guys! You deserved those A's!!!

Now, back to the main point of this blog post.
To those of you that didnt score, here's my two cents for you guys. I hope it will benefit you guys in some ways, Insya Allah. Amiin.

I know how it felt like, not getting all those 9A's for all 9 subjects that I took. I know how disappointed it felt, not scoring the most important exam for 11 years of schooling. I know. Trust me I know all of that feeling. My result was neither very bad nor very good. It was average. But considering I was a student from a boarding school, it was a bit disappointing. Ya lah. Malaysians have this kind of thoughts yang budak asrama penuh WAJIB dapat straight A's!!!!! Budak asrama penuh budak pandai gila tahap Einstein. So yeah, kalau kau budak asrama penuh or mrsm or sekolah elit, the pressure is 10x harder because you have to live up to the expectations of people around you. So just imagine mannn. Dgn result I yg average tu... And lagi 'best' bila my gang, 3 out of 12 dapat straight A's, my best best best friend forever dapat straight A's, my friend yg sekolah harian dapat straight A's with God knows how many A+ she got but berderet laaahhh haih. So yeah...

But you know what? I didnt cry at all, the day of the results tu. Not a single tears. Instead, what I felt was, calm. Tenang sangat. HAHA. Pelik kan? I didnt get straight but I didnt feel anything other than the feeling of calmness. Frustration tu adalah sikit but I got over it. So why? Kenapa Adina boleh tak nangis tak kecewa tak meratap and all??? KENAPA KENAPA????

Because, nights before, bila hari result makin dekat, I solat every night, asking for strength and serenity. Whatever my result is, I asked Him that I will be given enough strength to say Alhamdulillah and feel peace. And Alhamdulillah, He granted me that. Bila I tengok my slip, I rasa bersyukur. Bersyukur yang tak tahu nak cakap mcm mana. Bersyukur sebab dalam slip result I, ada a few A's yang I boleh banggakan dgn diri sendiri. Despite being hamba yang lalai dalam mengingati Allah, He was kind enough to grant me a few A's for my SPM. Ya Allah, bersyukurnya!

What I'm trying to say is that, whatever your result is, BERSYUKUR. Syukur. Say Alhamdulillah. Because, ITU REZEKI KAMU. That is what Allah has written for you. Yeah you can be sad and disappointed but dont go beyond that. Dont dwell and say 'Aku bodoh' 'I'm not good enough' yada yada yada... Syukur, sayang. Sebab apabila kita bersyukur, kita redha dgn apa yg Allah dah takdirkan untuk kita. And bila kita redha, kita rasa tenang. And bila kita bersyukur, Allah akan tambah nikmat dalam hidup kita. Maybe, kita tak berjaya sekarang sebab Allah, Dia tengah simpan something bigger than this. A victory that is much better than getting straight A's in SPM. Who knows? Kita tak tau. Kita hamba, our knowledge are limited. But Allah is Al-'Alim, sayang. He definitely knows what He is doing. He loves his servants so much. Why would He want to destroy you? As much as your mother wants the best for you, He wants the BEST for you too. Maka, jangan sedih ya? Pegang satu benda ni,

Semua yang terjadi, ada hikmah. Everything is a blessing. Either it's obvious or in disguise. You'll find out when Allah lets you do so. Okay?

Sudah. Jangan nangis lagi. Jangan fikir dah that you're not good enough. We all existed because Allah wants us to exist. Isnt that a blessing? Allah gave us air to breathe. Isnt that a blessing? Allah permits our body to function well and perfect. Isnt that a blessing?

'Maka nikmat Tuhanmu yang mana yang engkau dustakan?'

Life is a bliss. And to really feel how blissful life is, be grateful with every little things, little ni'mat that Allah gave you instead of dwelling on some bigger things.

Rezeki tu dah tertulis.
We only have to believe Him :)
Insya Allah, He will reward you when time comes.

That's all for me. Hope that my humble thoughts will somehow those sadness in your mind and heart, insya Allah.

Salam sayang,

(p/s: kalau tak tenang juga, buka Allah's love letter. Insya Allah, you'll fin ultimate peace)

Nineteen (Special Post)

Assalamualaikum w.b.t

(I'm writing this while listening to Sebiru Hari Ini by Edcoustic so pardon me if I get emotional in some parts of my post )

Hellloooooooo /cough/ omg banyaknya habuk ok sorry tak lame joke kbye.

Haahahahahaha okay sooooooo hnmmm. Padah lama tak blogging. I'm currently experiencing writer's block but I'll try my best to blog. Okay sooo why is it after months of abandoning this humble blog, I decided to write something? Well, it's because of #EJCamp y'allsssss!!!!!

Wait whaaaaattt in the world is #EJCamp?

#EJCamp is a camp organized by Malaysia's famous twitter-based English learning platform (am I using the correc term?) which is EnglishJer. It's the first time ever they organized a camp for their lucky followers (I'm one of them) which were selected through applications and essays.

(p/s: sapa tak kenal EJ dia lame HAHAHAHAHAHAHAH K tak sorry bye)

So, I spent my previous weekends attending #EJCamp at Nur Laman Bestari. THE. CAMP. WAS. BEYOND. AWESOME. I cannot find a word more awesome than AWESOME to describe how AWESOME IT WAS MAN!!!

The first day.... was awkward. Since I am half introvert and socially awkward, I hardly spoke to anyone at KL Central while waiting for the bus to the campsite. So, I basically sat further than other people and looking at the never-ending crowd. Naik bas pun mcm tu jugak. Senyap je. We arrived at the campsite at around 5, I think. The campsite was, Subhanallah.... Cantiknya. With the crystal clear river and the greenery of trees and the freshness of the air.... Masya Allah. Once we arrived, we set up the tents and washed ourselves up and had dinner. The first session was briefing with the Camp Masters and ice breaking. We played this game called Two Truths, One Lie. Mine was;

1. My dad is a Chinese
2. I could eat a plate of plain rice and budu just like that.
3. (ok sorry I forgot the 3rd one)

Guess which one is the lie? YASSSSSS THAT'S CORRECT! NUMBER 1 IS A LIE /claps my hands and give you a standing ovation/

And then we were told to find the camp master that we were assigned to. Mine was Kak Atiqah. And you know what? She's like, a grown up version of me! We have almost similar personality and interest and life stories and she's from Kelate too yeayyy! It was fun talking to her and I felt comfortable with her immediately. We went back to the campsite and it's CAMPFIRE TIME! The guys lit up a campfire and we sat around it, sharing stories (creepy and ghosts stories were included and I kinda chickened out a bit blerghhhh Dina is such a scaredy cat) and ate marshmallows (Thank you Fahani /throws a bunch of hearts for you and your marshmallows/) and that's the end of Day 1.

Day 2.
My tent mates and I woke at 5.45 am and we showered. WE TOOK A SHOWER AT 5 FREAKING AM. I definitely regretted the decision to shower once the coldness of the water reached my feet. Mana tak sejuk wehhh air direct from bukit kotttttt!!!! Lepas tu solat then tidur balik MWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA. Teruk perangai anak dara ni tidur lepas subuh heh macam mana nak kahwin /smh/

The first session for the day was a talk about confidence with Sharifah Amani. For this, I really thank Allah for giving me the chance to attend this camp. Every words, every words that came out from her mouth was so inspiring, Masya Allah. It felt like a wake up call for me. What I remember the most is when she talked about surrendering herself. Surrender as in berserah pada ketentuan Allah, ONLY AFTER YOU'VE WORKED YOUR ASS OFF. To me, she really applied the concept of 'Faidza adzamtu fatawakkal'alallah' which means, 'selepas kamu beradzam(berusaha), bertawakal lah kamu kepada Allah' which I'm still trying to instill it in myself. And another thing that I striked my heart was when she said,

'He texts us and calls us 5 times a day kot. But kita mcm kadang2 buat, kadang2 malas, kadang2 lambat. Kan? What do you feel when someone replied to ur text late? Pissed off lah kan? Haaa. Dia kan Pencipta kita. Try lah. Usaha to answer His calls. Answer His calls cus He is always listening.'


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